Critical Chance

Category: Monday Tidbits

Is failure holding you back?

“If you want to become whole, let yourself be partial.
If you want to become straight, let yourself be crooked.
If you want to become full, let yourself be empty.
If you want to be reborn, let yourself die.
If you want to be given everything, give everything up.”
– Lao Tzu

Who turned setbacks into success?

J.K. Rowling spent her post-college years lost.

Since her parents grew up poor, they strongly encouraged her to get a vocational degree instead of studying Literature in college. When she decided to ignore their advice, J.K developed a fear that her parents were right and she would end up a failure.

It was seven years after graduating when she hit rock bottom; her short marriage ended, she lost her job, and she was a single parent (not to mention nearly homeless).

“The fears that my parents had had for me, and that I had had for myself, had both come to pass, and by every usual standard, I was the biggest failure I knew,”
-J.K. Rowling

Yet it was experiencing this failure, which freed her to write Harry Potter.

Fifteen years later, Rowling highlighted this integral life moment in her commencement speech delivered to Harvard graduates:

“So why do I talk about the benefits of failure?
Simply because failure meant a stripping away of all the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me.
Had I really succeeded at anything else, I might never have found the determination to succeed at the one area I believed I truly belonged.
I was set free, because my greatest fear had been realized and I was still alive… And so rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.”
-J.K. Rowling

WATCH HER SPEECH HERE.

Is your obstacle instead an advantage?

Our instinct is to run away from uncomfortable experiences but that’s a mistake.

It’s our journey that informs us of our true selves; including the downs as much as the ups.

It isn’t until you lose that you realize how badly you wanted to win… or, perhaps, that the score never mattered at all.

To succeed, let yourself fail.

When we hit rock bottom we have the opportunity to remodel and embrace our full potential.

Are you striving towards yours?

September 17, 2018
Are you striving for this moment?
“BOY,” a German music duo, was touring the U.S. in 2017.

Their recent album was selling well in Europe, but they were still relatively unknown. When they arrived in Brooklyn for their first show, they were prepared to inspire a crowd of new listeners.

Yet when they started performing, they froze in awe; the entire audience was singing their song.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jry1www0xoU

After decades of practice, this is the moment we strive for.
- an olympic athlete runs ten miles each day, just to compete in a single 100-yard dash
- a parent sacrifices personal interests for that of their children, just to see their kids discover a passion
- a musician practices in solitude each day, just to hear one person sing their song
It’s where our determination finally meets our aspirations.

Some people dream of success, while other people get up every morning and make it happen.
-Wayne Huizenga

Your moment is out there, waiting.

Go make it happen.
August 21, 2018
Every Story Needs Chapters
Chapter 1
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk
I fall in.
I am lost…
I am hopeless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.
Chapter 2
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I’m in the same place.
But it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.
Chapter 3
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in…it’s a habit
My eyes are open; I know where I am;
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.
Chapter 4
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
Chapter 5
I walk down another street.
Autobiography in Five Chapters by Portia Nelson

It’s easy to beat ourselves up for falling back into bad habits.
- Snack on junk food after a day of healthy eating
- Miss a few workouts after a week of daily exercise
- Buy an expensive gift after a month of deliberate saving
We forget that self-improvement is ongoing; habit change takes time. Our greatest ambitions take years (even decades); they are achieved through incremental improvements and compounding interest.

Instead of focusing on getting it perfect right away, focus on progressing to the next chapter.

You’re not flawless and never will be.

Dust yourself off and get out there, you have a story to write.
August 6, 2018
Three quotes on failure

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
-Winston Churchill

We tend to allow the fear of failure or rejection to stop us from starting the things we care about. Truth is, failure is inevitable, and in all cases, it is necessary for progress.

“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all – in which case, you fail by default.”
-J.K Rowling

What a pity it would be to live your whole life without trying that new hobby, or sharing that inspirational idea. We all have things we’d like to start, but we hesitate to begin.

Don’t.

“If you want to conquer fear, don’t sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”
-Dale Carnegie

If there’s something you’ve been meaning to do, start today.

Life is about putting yourself out there, learning, and failing. Incremental improvements allow us to achieve our full potential.

But to live it, you need to start.

July 23, 2018
We not me

An executive once told me his top trick for hiring great people, and it wasn’t a difficult brain teaser or a credential on a resume.

“Listen for how much the candidate talks about themselves versus the team. Was it their personal accomplishment, or do they credit a larger group of people?
Keep a small scorecard in the back of your head and count the number of times they use I or ME vs. OUR or WE. When organizations truly thrive, they are built around we-based individuals.”

It’s well-known that teams at Google are given less resources than requested. If a manager says they need 10 Engineers to get the job done, they’re purposely given half that number.

Forget interviewing, consider the implications this has on the way we speak to each other and lead our teams.

While it’s easier to use me-first language because it feels more direct and natural, taking the extra time to review your emails and communication will elevate your influence. This quality doesn’t stop at the office – it even works with the five-year old who’s never ready for bedtime.

Embracing the “we” in our lives makes us better teammates, partners and leaders.

So… what do we think?

July 16, 2018
Scarcity breeds clarity

In 2008, Google co-founder Sergey Brin experienced something new. For the first time since the company was founded, the economy was in a recession.

During the annual shareholders meeting, there was a subtle yet fascinating comment Sergey made about the pullback in the economy.

“I never imagined I would be writing one in the midst of an economic crisis unlike any we have seen in decades. As I write this, search queries are reflecting economic hardship, the major market indexes are one half of what they were less than 18 months ago, and unemployment is at record levels.
Nonetheless, I am optimistic about the future, because I believe scarcity breeds clarity: it focuses minds, forcing people to think creatively and rise to the challenge.“
-Sergey Brin

It’s well-known that teams at Google are given less resources than requested. If a manager says they need 10 Engineers to get the job done, they’re purposely given half that number.

Why?

Until you’re completely resource constraint, you don’t actually know what the bare minimum is to operate efficiently. When we have less to work with, we’re forced to be more articulate with our asks and more deliberate with our time.

There’s a common thread I find when I ask my incredibly talented female co-workers how they do it all; raising a two kids, traveling for sales pitches, and still finding time for PTA meetings.

“Since I have less time, I have a much deeper appreciation for it and what truly matters. It allows me to bring my full self to every conversation, and value others’ time. With less, I’ve gained a new perspective, which nets out to more.”

Next time you feel stretched for time, take a deep breath.

Your limited resources, could be your greatest strength

May 28, 2018
The reputation pivot

A successful executive once said to me,

“The higher you move up in a company, the more important relationships become. VPs choose whether or not to help you based on your reputation, not your skills.”

It’s this weird evolution where, when you FIRST start out in your career, your value is backed (mostly) by your abilities. Heck, you just graduated school and you barely know anyone (or anything). But fast-forward five, ten, or twenty years, and suddenly the inputs flip. Your relationships are now driving the majority of your value.

Feel like you’re plateauing at work?

Maybe you’ve accelerated your skills, but have you equally grown your relationship talent stack? Sure you might be technically capable of that next job, but are you good enough in reputation and networking?

Perhaps it’s time to pivot your focus; skill alone will not get you there.

May 21, 2018
The hidden base
You’re interviewing people for your new sales team, who would you rather hire?

Group A: Scores high on an aptitude test, but has average levels of optimism

Group B: High levels of optimism, but scores average on an aptitude test

Turns out someone ran this study and if you picked B, your team performed better. Not just slightly, but significantly better.

“The optimistic group outsold their more pessimistic counterparts by 19% in year one and 57% in year two.”
Eric Barker, BUTWT

While intelligence and skill are important, we are discovering that there’s this hidden section to the chart being less discussed and it’s at the base.

75% of long term job success is predicted by three factors:
- Social Connection – the depth and breadth in your social relationships
- Optimism – the belief that your behavior matters in the midst of challenge
- Perception – the way that you perceive stress
Most people have the equation flipped (they focus on IQ), but this month we’ll be diving deeper into the base.

Buckle up because May is all about Social Connections; how to build them and why they matter.
May 14, 2018
Which group are you in?
Once upon a time, a pottery teacher split her class into two halves.
To the first half she said, “You will spend the semester studying pottery, planning, designing, and creating your perfect pot. At the end of the semester, there will be a competition to see who’s pot is the best”.
To the other half she said, “You will spend your semester making lots of pots. Your grade will be based on the number of completed pots you finish. At the end of the semester, you’ll also have the opportunity to enter your best pot into a competition.”
The first half of the class threw themselves into their research, planning, and design. Then they set about creating their one, perfect pot for the competition.
The second half of the class immediately grabbed fistfuls of clay and started churning out pots. They made big ones, small ones, simple ones, and intricate ones; their muscles ached for weeks from the effort.
At the end of the semester, both halves were invited to enter their most perfect pot into the competition.
Once the votes were counted, all of the best pots came from the students that were tasked with quantity.

How could the volume group possibly win?

Planning is essential in achieving our goals, but sometimes we get hung up in it too long.

Just because you’re working on something, doesn’t mean you’re making progress. There’s a subtle, yet critical difference between planning (motion) and doing (action).

I can…
- Research the best diet methods (motion) or change what I eat (action)
- Email leads in my network (motion) or meet them in-person over coffee (action)
- Brainstorm business models (motion) or pitch and win investors (action)
Sometimes, we use “planning” as an excuse to guard ourselves against failure, but failure is critical to success. More likely than not, you’re ready to jump right in, but you’re scared to take the first step.

When we focus on a particular goal, we over-index on motion; planning feels safe.

But to form our full potential, we need to mistakes and feel uncomfortable; that’s action. As we saw last week, setbacks are where all the personal growth happens.

“Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.”
-Henry Ford

While the planners were on a quest for a single, perfect pot, the volume group had real practice, which made them better at building pots. When the stakes are high, we forget to just do it.

So, what’s the pottery contest in your life?

Are you too busy planning for perfection?

It’s time to get out there and make more pots.
May 7, 2018
Do you need this to succeed?
In 1987, Paulo Coelho had something special to share; he had completed a story which followed a boy searching for his destiny.
After pitching the book to various publishing houses, it was accepted and printed to sell that same year.
Over the next 6 months, he would go on to sell……. 2 books.
The publishing company revoked the rights, and the books were removed from their untouched shelves.
But Coelho was convinced it was a great book, “It was written from my soul,” he said. So, instead of giving up, he started knocking on doors.
A year later, he was given a break; a new publisher decided to give Paulo a second chance and the book was published again. Slowly, through word of mouth, it finally began selling; first one-thousand, then three-thousand, then ten-thousand book by book.
Today, The Alchemist has sold more than 115 million copies worldwide and has been translated into over 71 languages.

Paulo Coelho later said, “I’ve been rejected many times (from publishers to girlfriends). This lead me to the best publishers in the world, and to the perfect wife.”

We tend to focus on the strengths of those who succeed, but what about their setbacks?
- A young entrepreneur has a coding gift, but what about the times investors laughed at their pitch?
- An olympic athlete has the perfect body-type, but what about the countless personal injuries they trained through?
Perhaps, it’s really the obstacles that are the most critical component to our success.

Not one, not two, but many, many obstacles.

The setbacks we encounter give us the opportunity for our true selves to develop. When we tough it out, we end up learning new lessons, which are applied in the final act of our stories.

There’s a tremendous power to feeling something deep within your soul. It’s only when we keep moving forward, over and over again, that we achieve our full destiny.

What’s your setback?

Believe in yourself – get out there and start knocking on doors.

You’re just one break away from becoming a worldwide hit.
April 30, 2018